Wordpress

Even though Blogger retracted their upcoming ban on adult material, I've still made a wordpress. I haven't decided fully if I'm going to be using completely that from now on or not, but just in case, here's the link. If I don't post here, check there.

https://omglilykitteh.wordpress.com/

So Bruce Willis wanted to be my Daddy today.

The photo op was worth the 10 minute free cuddle on his private beach.

xD

Have you ever SecondLifed?

If you haven't heard about Strawberry Singh's Monday Memes...well, she does Memes on Mondays! *laughs*

I haven't actually done one of her little blog entry ideas before, but this one looked fun, so I present Strawberry Singh's - Have you ever SecondLifed? 

1.] Have you ever owned a Sim in SecondLife?
Uhm. No. Not REALLY. Like right now, I don't own the Babygirls' sim, but I have access to do anything with it and...well. Basically what DJ has, I have available. So. No I don't OWN it but I.....something...it?

2.] Have you ever created content in SecondLife?
Yes! Nothing super fancy, but I make pictures and tattoos sometimes. I've made a few Slink nails, some gestures and a lounge build that is currently being used by Femboi Fantasies in world. :)

3.] Have you ever driven a vehicle in SecondLife?
YES! And crashed every single one of them. From cars, to TukTuks. Stealth Bombers and a go-karts and scooters and more. I'm actually better at flying then driving, but that isn't really saying much of anything.

4.] Have you ever gone sky diving in Second Life? 
Yes! Once or twice with Ell and Matt. 

5.] Have you ever played a sport in Second Life?
Nope!

6.] Have you ever gone clubbing in SecondLife?
I live in clubs. Pretty much literally. I mean, one of my skyboxes is on the Babygirls Escorts sim anyways. 

7.] Have you ever fangirled/fanboyed someone in Second Life? 
Uh, a little. I mean I've seen designers or bloggers out and about before and thought to myself "OMG THATS __________" but I've never actually managed to make myself say hi.

8.] Have you ever taken a picture of your avatar in water in SecondLife?
Yes.

9.] Have you ever taken a picture of a sunset in SecondLife?
Yes.

1o.] Have you ever taken a nude picture of yourself in SecondLife?
God, for a while there it would have been a better question to ask if I'd taken a CLOTHED picture in SecondLife.

11.] Have you ever dated in SecondLife?
Yes. I dated someone on my first SL account. When we split I left that account as well because all the friends I had on it were mostly HIS friends. Then I changed to my current account as my main. On THIS account I've had numerous guys interested in me and a few like...go hang out somewhere dates. But I've been partnered once as Slut Fallen and that was with Kovu. And now I'm...well. Off the market again, even if not partnered. Yet. Soon though maybe? I hope? Anyways.

12.] Have you ever had, or attended, a wedding in SecondLife?
I have attended a couple. One or two for a close friend and one or two as just a generic guest for people I SL work with. 

I haven't HAD one though. I go back and forth between wanting to have one sometime. On one hand I think they're kinda silly. But on the other, I'd love making a pretty venue and getting dressed up and having a big ridiculous party with all my/our friends. So. I dunno. Kovu gave me a pretty ring when he asked me to partner him, and I DID like that. I guess a SL "proposal" and "wedding" does sound super cute and romantic but I dunno. lol. I

13.] Have you ever engaged in sexual activity in SecondLife?
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
yes.

14.] Have you ever been to Bukkake Bliss in SecondLife?
 yes actually! I knew a guy that was friends with the owner and apparently had one of the stone lions there named after him when he helped out with their tier when they were starting out. I don't know if that's true, but he never really lied to me or had a reason to, so it's probably true. I went there not long ago just to look around because I forgot it still existed. It hasn't changed  bit.

A quiet place.

Sometimes you feel like you need to be alone for a bit.

But then, maybe you were wrong.

Sometimes it's the little things.

It's funny sometimes how something can just cut you to the bone. Even when you take a second to think about it and you know that it wasn't anything, that initial gut punch of reading/hearing it just makes your heart stop. Then try to pound through your chest. Your breathing slows and your body shakes and your eyes tear and for that moment there's no semblance of rational thought.

That happened to me tonight. Sometimes it can be for something good. Sometimes it isn't. Tonight it wasn't.

It was just an avalanche of things. No. Avalanche isn't even the right word. That would imply that suddenly the ground shifted beneath me when this was more like... something that took some build up. More like a crack on the ice that I ignored. Fuck, that I followed even. And it kept splintering and there were parts that held together and a few small holes appearing until tonight when I just fell through.

And the thing is... it wasn't even really anyone's fault. Not really. Sure there were little things here and there that different people had done to contribute to it. But it wasn't something that could be blamed on anyone either. It was just the sum of the parts colliding in just the right way that I had to leave the computer to cry for a minute.

Logic kicks in eventually and things get calmed down. Nothing was done intentionally to hurt me. No one set out to knock the wind from my sails. It just happened. There are more things that can happen that at this point, after being discussed, would be more difficult to excuse.

And while temporary peace has been made in the situation, with a promise of something more permanent tomorrow, right now I just feel exhausted.

mentally, not physically.

weak.

vulnerable.

scared as fuck.

hopeful. and skeptical. and... very, very small.

Sometimes things are hard.

For the most part I have been happier in SecondLife recently than I have been in years. I'm working in a great place. I make plenty to be able to pay my tier and shop. My photography business has increased like, a million times over. Which isn't actually that much when you know how much I USED to get hired to do. Anyways.

Overall... things are wonderful and I can't think of a time when I've been genuinely this happy.

But sometimes things still get hard. Even when your brain knows something, your heart doesn't always want to agree. And tonight I don't really know which side is in the lead.

And I'm being cryptic. I know, I'm sorry.

I guess part of it is that there's always going to be a chance that the logical side is wrong. Or at least, mildly wrong.

The emotional side kind of feels like.... buh right now. It can't even really be put into words. I just feel... vaguely


buh.

bleh.

feeling a bit needy tonight, but i don't want to be annoying.

>.<

not quite sure what to do with myself. lol.

o hay bewbs.

Anyways.

Here's a pic.

oh. ok.

nevermind then i guess.

edit: i'm probably being melodramatic. i know. but still.

oh.

ok.

Never a dull moment at Babygirls Escorts. lmao.

The owner, DJ, encourages and supports my random weird ass side. He gives Ell and I silly toys to play with, like the unicorn head, go-karts, scooters.... last night I laughed so hard with him and Ell that I was literally in tears and gave myself a headache. It was fucking magical and probably some of the most fun I've had in SecondLife in a while.

♥

Daddy's Girl

Babygirls Escorts

It's been a slow, lazy, COLD day today. Dancing a bit at a new place called Babygirls Escorts. The owners are nice, and the rules are simple. Nothing too crazy or controlling. Which I like. So since I was there I decided to fiddle around with Gimp a bit and make a banner for it in my picks.

And here it is.

Yes.

Mother FUCKIN' UNICORNS! @_@

If you haven't heard, the theme for January's Collabor88 is UNICORNS.

HNNNNG. @.@ I freakin' love unicorns. I always have. I was one of those kids. You know those kids. The ones with unicorn stuff all over their room. Yeah, that was me. It still is, kinda, except now I have fewer unicorn items in RL and the ones I do have are nicely displayed on a shelf.

In SecondLife however.... I went into a unicorn buying FRENZY this morning. I spent L$6,000 at Collabor88. And I'll likely go back for a few more of the items in different colors before the month is through.

Lu, if you're reading this, I could sure use L$6,000 right about now! xD lol Hell, anyone that's reading this, I could use 6k right about now! 

But seriously, unicorns are worth it. There will be plenty of pictures of me in some of my new items later on, but right now I'm dancing my pink covered, unicorn lovin' ass off at Escort Oasis in hopes of at least recouping a third of today's spending. Wish me luck!

♥ 

Rarrrrgh. D:

I know my layout is still sort of screwed up, but I'm a little too annoyed to delve into the process of figuring out why yet. >.<  I have no idea why the date area just says undefined. *sigh* But I'll figure it out eventually! lol. It's probably something stupid.

Annnyways, I wanna rant. Which is nothing new right? I do that all the time here. It's one of the main reasons I have this here. lol. Sometimes there's shit about secondlife that annoys the fuck out of me and I don't really want to put it all over Facebook, and anyone who DOESN'T play SL wouldn't understand any of it anyways.

So. I've been working in a club in SL for a few months now. It's been fine. I've gotten tipped, met a few people and been hired from it a few times. There's some girls there that I don't care for, but that's what happens when women work together. Our personalities just don't mesh so I don't really enjoy being around them. No problem. I generally just don't work when they're there. It's pretty easy to avoid people. lol.

Now one of the reasons I came to this club to work is SPECIFICALLY because in the rules it says, and I quote:

★Voice is preferred and allowed here HOWEVER it is NOT required.

Awesome! I can voice sometimes and the times I can't or aren't in the mood to, I don't have to! Right?

...right?

I THOUGHT I was right since I've been working there for months now. I've been in there with and without voice. I've had the owners and general manager and other managers in there with me while I was NOT on voice. No one ever said a word. Then today one of them IMs me and says I HAVE to be able to hear voice while working.

asgioahgfaowhga;ognagFUCK.

REALLY?!? Monnnths later and now you're telling me I have to hear voice? Months after I've been working there and making tips and getting hired and giving you a cut. Months after I've been renting a room on your sim because I thought it was a cute idea. Months after, between paying that rent, their cut and my adboard, I've given you thousssandsss of Linden, you decide I have to have voice on. FOR FUCK'S SAKE. COME ON.

I get that a lot of people love voice in SL. I know that. But I also know that there are plenty that don't. I want to be able to voice when I feel like it, but not be required to do it when I don't. Honestly, 90% of my clients are text only. I've had 5 figure days of earning with just text. Multiple times. My emotes are generally well liked. Hell, I know several guys who prefer to not ever use voice because they say it takes them out of the fantasy.

SO if you're going to REQUIRE voice to be on, maybe you shouldn't have in your rules that VOICE IS NOT REQUIRED. DOES THAT MAKE FUCKING SENSE TO YOU?

I'm contemplating quitting the club. I dunno. I can go in sometimes with voice when it's empty I guess. Because last time I had my voice on in there I heard two managers, a girl and a client talking about the most retarded shit. Dog fucking and gay husbands and how they're practically virgins anyways and just... lots of crude, vulgar things that generally probably shouldn't be on the club floor. You obviously know I don't have a problem with crude, vulgar things but a lot of potential clients DO. So unless your club is catering towards those themes, the club floor should be more subdued and seductive than crass and vulgar.

Ugh.

I'll probably end up quitting.

Probably unrelated events, but hey, I smiled.

I know this is going to make me sound like a catty bitch, but hey, sometimes I AM a catty bitch so it's ok.

Every where you work there's always going to be some people you don't like. I think that's even more true when you're a woman working with only woman, like in an SL adult club. There are NUMEROUS girls that work at this club that I don't particularly care for, for whatever reasons. And I don't try to cause drama or anything intentionally. If I'm working at the same time as they are, I just mind my own business, though I generally try to just avoid them completely for my own sake.

Some of them are just obnoxious and rude. And earlier today I came in while one of them was dancing and getting tipped by a guy. I got on the stage on the opposite side of the room and didn't even say hello. I decided to let the girls that were talking to him just keep going without me interrupting to say hi to everyone. Within minutes of being on stage the guy had tipped the girl I don't like 2 or 3 times. Good for her.

Then he tipped me too. I was a bit surprised since I hadn't even said hi, but I emoted him. Within like 2 minutes he IMs me and asks for my card. She announced she was leaving, and then he hired me. xD

Height Problems.

So we all know the height in the avatar edit area of SL is pretty fickle. Firestorm will say you're one thing, SL's viewer will say another, and there are dozens of various height detectors for sale as well.

My viewer says I'm 5'6, in flat feet, no hover. A few of my height detectors range a bit differently, but are all still generally about the same ballpark.

I TP over to a Lolita sim to check it out and I get a security guy or something IMing me and telling me to "grow up a little". This is the SECOND time someone there has told me I look like a child. So before going there this time around I actually took care to make sure there was no way my avi could be mistaken for underage. But I mean, I still had pigtails because come onnn. Lolita place? Pigtails? Obviously.

Anyways, he says I'm showing up as being 4'11. I said, "Really??" in a bit of an incredulous manner because...well, REALLY? I tell him what my viewer and height detectors at home had said and that his scanner was waaay different than mine, with an obligatory "lol" thrown in because I wasn't trying to be a bitch I was just laughing at the ridiculous differences. Then he gets a little snotty like, "Yes, I is better the yours". That's a direct quote btw.

At this point I'm just like, screw it. Not worth it, and left.

But come onnnn. Really? Under 5 foot? I don't think so.

Angel.